Dear Family and Friends,
As I prepare for the arrival of Hannah, I have learned that while decorating the nursery and stocking up on baby essentials is important, even more important is the emotional health of my baby. In her short life (8 months today!), my daughter will have gone through more changes and life altering experiences than most adults could handle. Imagine how much harder the changes will be for her. While she may not consciously remember the events, she will still experience immense loss, including feelings of grief and trauma. Currently she is very attached to her nanny and next week that precious woman will place her in my arms and Hannah will deeply feel the loss of her in her life. She's already experienced the loss of her birthmother and will soon experience the loss of familiar and comforting caretakers as well as the sights, smells, and language of her birth country. Her world will turn upside down. She will struggle with feeling safe and secure and she may lack the ability to trust that I will meet her needs.
I am prepared to meet her emotional needs so that she learns that I will always take care of her and I will always keep her safe. I covet your prayers for Hannah and I as she learns to trust me and pray that her little heart opens up to love me as her Mom.
I also need your support. In order to form a strong and healthy attachment I will allow her to regress so that she has the opportunity to go through all of the emotional stages with me despite her chronological age. Although it may appear that I am spoiling her, I have been advised that it is best that I meet every need quickly and consistently. Until she has learned that I am her parent, I will need to be her primary caretaker at all times. It is essential that I always hold Hannah, feed her, and do all of the nurturing. You may wonder how long this will take, but the timeline is different for every child. I will follow her lead and trust my instincts as her parent rather than worry about what society expects.
We have all been waiting anxiously for Hannah to arrive but she has not been waiting for us. She may show her grief and confusion in many ways and I am prepared to help her through it and prove that she and I are a forever family and this truly is her last stop. I trust that as my family and friends you will help me to do what is best for my daughter, and I thank you in advance for your support and understanding.
(For more attachment information I recommend going to: A4everFamily.org)