Friends, my adoption journey is at a very important decision making time. As much as I am the one to physically make the decision, I want to do only what God wants and how He leads me. I am seeking His guidance and leading as to whether to proceed with the adoption or call my agency and withdraw my application. As much as that would hurt unbelievably to do, I am willing to do so if it's what I should.
I am asking that you pray for me and with me, asking God to lead and make it abundantly clear what I should do. After much prayer, I have decided that if nothing has changed by the end of October, I will call my agency and ask them to withdraw my application.
Some may wonder why I have set a specific date for things to happen. My reason for this is that my agency called on May 30th informing me that I could begin my home study. This step of the process normally takes approx. 4 months. To date, I have completed the majority of the paperwork but have not met with my social worker since the beginning of June and the biggest portion of this step of the adoption in both time and paperwork is the home study. While I am praying, seeking, waiting and not meeting with my social worker, I am delaying another single lady/gentleman from pursuing their dream of adopting a baby girl/boy from China. With singles spots restricted to 8% of the adoptions from China, they are at a premium and currently I am holding one of those precious spots. I feel that I can no longer allow my indecision to hinder another person.
All that being said, there are still 27 days between now and the end of October. In that time, God can work a miracle as He is a God of miracles! If He wants this adoption to happen then I can't wait to see Him work! If not, then I will have my answer and my application will be withdrawn.
So many of you are praying with me and for me and I am so very, very thankful for each of you!!!
As a next step, I have an important meeting scheduled for 2:00 tomorrow afternoon, Friday, October 7th to discuss the adoption. Today at work I was made aware of a fairly new program called the, 'Employee Assistance Program.' I had read about it when it first came out and thought it was mainly a program designed to assist people with counseling needs that they might have. (What a wonderful service to offer to employees.) A coworker mentioned to me today that they can also help in special financial circumstances of which the adoption may apply. I called the 1-800# this morning and was told that yes, there is something in place to assist those adopting a child internationally. What that help is I have no idea. It may be financial help in the way of a loan or grant or it may be something totally different. I don't know. Will qualify for assistance? I don't know. What I do know, is that they were able to offer me a 1 hour phone interview tomorrow at 2:00. As I'm guessing you can tell, I'm cautiously optimistic about what I may learn tomorrow.
Dear friends, it will take nothing short of a miracle to allow me to adopt a child. But, if adopting is what God has planned for me then He will perform that miracle and we will all be able to praise Him for it. If the answer is 'no' I will still praise Him for answered prayer!
Thank you again for all your prayers. I will let you know how things go tomorrow.
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